literature

The Fate of Benjamin, Pt 1

Deviation Actions

cableraywire's avatar
By
Published:
549 Views

Literature Text

Sand.
Grain upon grain of sand. Sand shattered from the earth, worn and ground against itself. Sand, A solid barrier, siphoning the dew and rain down under its crust, soaking its feet in cool and moisture, and bathing its head in heat and fire. The wind, angry at the loss of precious vapors, throws itself against the sand, and the sand burns the wind with the heat of the sun. They fight, ignorant of the occasional traces of life that unluckily pass through their duel. But in their fight, the forces of the sand have gathered into dunes, as the wind has driven them there, and sand has been forced to relinquish regions of its hoarded pools. Life, by happy fortune, may find these spoils, unvalued by the wind and deserted by the sand, and Life may find it's refuge here. Here: Oasis.

Man, though the whims of fate is sent through the duel of the wind and sand, but fate wants more from man. And so fate sends man to Oasis.


-------

Benjamin, despite the toll of the journey and the complaints of his body, walked over the next of the infinite procession of dunes. But as he reached the crest of this dune, his spirits were renewed. His heart reached levels of joy he had believed it would never reach again. The green of plants  entered his vision, and for the first time in -- days? weeks? months? years? -- he smiled. Large groves of desert trees stood before him, surrounding a brilliant pool of water. Benjamin clutched his staff with new strength and headed steadily for the pool. As he reached the edge, he dropped his staff and fell to his knees, into the depths of the water, even though the cool minerals stung his damaged and bleeding skin.  Great gulps of water flowed past his throat, quenching his thirst. But his stomach was not ready for his exuberance, and rebeled against him. Water spewed back out of his mouth and he coughed and sputtered. He gasped for air, and then sat in the water, stunned, his mind fragmented.

(continued in part 2)
Another piece written in a fit of creativity. Hope you like it. I'll keep expanding it, especially if I get enough interest in it. Leave comments if you want more! (Or if you don't ;) )

EDIT: Changed tense of second section. I think it works better and breaks up the two narratives.

Hooray for part 2! [link]
Comments23
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
MetalMagpie's avatar
Interesting start, but you might be surprised to hear that the second part grabs better than the first part. People like to read about people. ;)

A couple of typos I picked up (corrections in bold):

...siphoning the dew and rain down under its crust, soaking its feet in cool and moisture, and bathing its head in heat and fire.

...and sand has been forced to relinquish regions of its hoarded pools.